Archive for March, 2008

Okay, as many of you know, your intrepid reporter loves to play poker. I’ve had a good deal of success at it over the last couple of years and would love to hit it big time someday. You know those guys that win a big WPT event on TV and you never see them again? I would have absolutely no problem being one of those guys. To play under the bright lights at the final table, just once, would be a dream come true.

Seeing that I don’t have the bankroll, or time really either, to try to slug out satellite tourneys at Foxwoods or buy directly in, I figured that this would have to remain a dream for a while. Then I saw something on Fox Sports called “The Best Damn Poker Show.” It stars world champion Phil Hellmuth and superstar Annie Duke as team captains in a reality TV type of setting. They play down to a final table and have teams and there’s plenty of back-and-forth between the two captains. It makes for good TV and some decent TV poker too. I have it on my TiVo season pass list and have seen them all so far.

So I was watching it last week when I saw they are accepting audition videos for the next season. I couldn’t help myself, I had to do it. Why not? It’s worth a try, right. I’ve got charisma and poker skill, and at least average looks.

My biggest hurdle, though, was coming up with a camera to make the video. My video camera is not digital, we got it like eight years ago. There’s no way that I have to be able to record something and then get in onto the computer. So, I had to borrow one.
Our awesome sales manager at The Enterprise, Chris Avis, came through and said he’d lend me his new camera, a great Sony gizmo that records directly to DVD. I thought I was in business, and I recorded one that I was happy with. Then I tried to get the thing onto the net and just couldn’t do it. Every time that I put the disc into my computer it claimed there was nothing on the disc, but I could somehow play it on the camera. I was more confused that Chris Webber at the end of a big game.

Then I Googled the specific camera to find out that I was not alone. Apparently this is something that happens quite a bit with that particular camera. The good news, I wasn’t entirely crazy. However, I was still out of luck and in need of a camera and time was winding down. The deadline to get the video in is tomorrow, after all.

But, my ace in the hole, Aaron, came through. As you might remember, Aaron and I were in Boston the other day for the Celtics game and I hooked my boy up and got us onto the court for pregame and we had a photo taken of the proceeding. It’s currently my wallpaper on this laptop. His little digital camera has a video mode, and it actually works pretty well. I sped over to his job and picked it up on Friday afternoon, with a 12-hour window to get it done.

So I started recording videos on Friday night around 10 PM. Take after take after take and finally I got one that I thought was in league with the one I had before. My plan was simple, tell them who I am, what I do, why I want this, and why I can get it done. All of that, plus I wanted to keep it to around 2-3 minutes. Anything more drones on. Also, I wanted to make sure it didn’t look too much like a hostage tape.

I showed the clip i was happiest with to Lyra, to get her point of view, and she wasn’t overly thrilled with it. “I liked the other one better, and our room is too messy.”

I didn’t even notice that the bed was only 3/4 made, and didn’t think it really mattered. But, if she wasn’t totally digging it, it wasn’t good enough.

So I waited until everyone went to bed, and then tried again. It took about another 10 takes to get one that i was remotely happy with. I’d end up speaking too quickly, trip over my words and then let out a cuss word. While it would have been funny to release that one (and maybe they’ll show up on the Director’s Cut one day), it wasn’t going to make it.

Finally, around 1 AM, I got one that I could live with. I don’t think it’s awesome by any means, but it gets the job done. I hit all of my points, and lay out a convincing enough argument to consider me for the show. This isn’t Survivor or Big Brother, it isn’t like I’m up against millions for a spot, just hundreds (I hope).

The following is my audition. I know many of you will probably just laugh. First of all, to add to the hilarity, I had no help, so that’s why there is a three second gap at the beginning. I would have cut that gap out, but the editing suite I downloaded was a trial edition and would have had a message across the top to buy the whole one if I posted it. That too might have been funny, but a tad too unprofessional, more than the 3-second gap at least.

And, I’m wearing pajama pants. You can’t see them, but I was wearing maroon PJ pants with reindeer on them. I threw the nice shirt over the T-shirt I was wearing.

Anyways, here you go. I’m sure Eagle One, or one of my other readers will have interesting comments, but I wanted to share it nonetheless. Hopefully I’ll be the one having the last laugh when I jet out to LA to film the show. That would be unbelievable. My fingers are crossed. That’s the funny thing. In poker you don’t want things to come down to luck, but in this case I think it will have to. Hope you’re rooting for me. I am.

For the past few weeks I’ve been dying to see 21, which is based on the successes of the MIT Blackjack Team of the lat 80s. The team, full of superstar card-counters from MIT (yeah, they was wicked smaht), legally fleeced the casinos and are now not allowed to step foot in a lot of those casinos. I’m waiting on the book at the library right now, but couldn’t wait to see the movie.

Now I’m dying to read the book.

The movie was okay, but ultimately a letdown. As for the table action, they made blackjack seem about as exciting as they could. I mean, it’s blackjack. The game itself lacks the drama that accompanies a game like poker.

For the casual movie-goer, the problems i had with the story will not bother them. My biggest problem is that this story happened nearly two full decades ago, but it is brought to us a modern-day drama.

They make up parts to the story that never really existed, as far as I understand the story. The whole angle around Cole Williams (Laurence Fishburn) is contrived to give the team an enemy from the outside. Also, and again this is as far I understand the story, the professor (Kevin Spacey) is also an addition to the story, and he could have existed as the lone antagonist had the film-makers not gotten too lazy.

Ultimately the biggest problem is that the story becomes a bit too predictable. They fall into the expected plot devices to drive things and also underdevelop some characters. Honestly, I still don’t understand why the character of Choi existed at all. He’s on the team, but never seems to do anything except steal stuff from the hotel rooms.

Our hero, Ben Campbell (played by Jim Sturgess), is likable enough, and his story makes us want to root for him. He goes through the expected rollercoaster ride of someone that comes from nothing, hits it big and then gives into some excess. His love interest, Jill Taylor (Kate Bosworth), doesn’t bring a whole lot to the table. We never really know why she got into this at all, nor what her real talents are. I guess we’re supposed to expect that she’s smart and good, but we’re never given evidence to support that at all.

And then there’s the underutilized Spacey. I mean you’ve got Kevin Freakin Spacey on your cast and he’s so one-dimensional. He’s too likable early and too hateable later, but his motives for turning evil aren’t very clear. Maybe he was always evil, but there’s no foreshadowing to that effect.

Lastly, we have Fishburne. He was okay, not great, but decent in his role as the security adviser. He does everything old school, and then just as we think he’s redeemed himself some, we see he’s a jerk ultimately. Had it all been true, I could have lived with it. But, seeing this is only “based on a true story,” I was disappointed with his ultimate arc. Money Matt, who accompanied us along with his wife, had the best line of the night. “Morpheus has been popping too many of the red pills, and they didn’t have any ephedra in them.”

Wanted to love this. Didn’t hate it, but just ended up being another pretty forgettable movie.

Over the weekend my buddy Aaron called me up and said his dad was bagging out of going to the Celtics game with him on Wednesday and asked if I wanted to go. Who says no to free tickets to see the best team in the NBA? Not me.

Aaron is the biggest C’s fan I know, and has been forever. He’s been to over a dozen games this year, and can tell you everything there is to know about that team. He’s an encyclopedia leprachaunia.

Now I know the C’s are pretty good on the PR side of things under Wyc Grousbeck, and I happen to have the owner’s email address. On a lark I decided to send old Wyc an email on Monday to see if it would be possible for us to come into The Garden early to have a photo taken down on the court. I figured, what the heck, can’t hurt to try. And, I sent it from my home email addy. There were no connections between the newspaper and that email, I did it as a fan to the owner.

I forgot about it and didn’t worry about it. Those guys are busy, and probably get a ton of like requests all the time. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Move on.

Then yesterday morning and email popped up telling me to be at The Garden at 5:30 to meet a representative from the C’s PR staff. They’d take care of us.

I called Aaron and told him the good news and told him he’d have to bail from work a little earlier than planned. I picked him up at 3:30 and we were on our way out of town. We hit the traffic just right. A little backup on the expressway, but minimal. We were parked at at the executive offices actually 20 minutes early.

So right at 5:30 our guide, a cool guy named David, showed up and took us through the bowels of the building. We went through a bunch of tunnels and hidden hallways and popped out right there on the court. It was cool. I’d never been that close to the floor before. I’ve covered several events at The Garden, but usually it’s from Level 9 and then down to the locker rooms. This was cool.

While we were waiting Big Baby Glen Davis warmed up, taking jumper after jumper and working with a coach on his inside moves. The big guy can shoot, that’s for sure. And he seemed to be just as affable with those around him as he does on TV. It was fun to watch the Big Baby work on the hook shot and his footwork. It was also fun to watch the Celtics’ cheerleaders work on their footwork too.

Once the dancers cleared out, we were ushered to center court and we knelt down on the leprachaun. We took about a half-dozen photos and then cleared the court so Steve Nash and Amare Stoudamire could take over, which was fine. They needed the court more than we did.

Aaron and I watched with wide eyes as Nash drained three after three after three from the corners. Then he did the same thing from the top of the arc. Then we discovered his weak spot, the top right wing. He made like two of 10 from that spot and it was clearly bugging him. Of course in the game he hit one three, from that spot. I turned to Aaron and laughed. So much for Nash’s kryptonite.

The game itself was enjoyable. The Celtics came out on fire, then let Phoenix back into the game. Then the home team blasted it open with a great third and fourth quarters. Paul Peirce made it look easy in the fourth quarter and Kevin Garnett was everywhere. Shaquille O’Neal is a beast, I’d never seen someone that takes up that much personal space.

All in all, it was an excellent time. I sent off an email to Wyc to say thank you. It’s good to know that a pro organization like that will take care of its fans.

Not much to say about the Sox because I really haven’ seen them play yet. Splitting the games in Tokyo is fine. It would have been nice to win both, but heading over there for all that craziness, 1-1 isn’t bad.

I’d have more to say, but right now I’ve got to run. My buddy came up with Celtics tix, and we’re leaving for the Gahden. I’ll have a very cool story to share in regards to that tomorrow.

Would’ve gotten something up earlier, but it’s been a nutty day. I’ve been back and forth from the high school, writing stories, doing interviews, you know — my job.

Awesome weekend. Some awesome games, too many to go over them all. My favorite that I actually got to sit down and take in yesterday was Mississippi State and Memphis. Of course I had to root for Memphis because I’ve got the Tigers winning it all in the office pool, but it was fun to watch MSU make a run. So close to tying it up at the end, heart-breaking way to have your season end, but it was great.

Now let me get this straight. The Red Sox open the season at 6 AM tomorrow? I’m supposed to wake up for the opener, I think not. Who’s idea were these stupid games anyway? I mean, do we need the Sox playing in Japan at all? And what about those poor folks in Oakland, for them the game starts at 3 AM. Might as well stay up all night. My uncle Steve told me that they’re having a bunch of beers and bagels specials at the bars in Boston.

I love the Red Sox, but think I can wait to watch the replay later in the day.

It’s just too bad. I usually get all jazzed up for opening day. Not this year. One, it’s a week too early. I’m just not in a baseball mindset yet. Two, the game’s at 6 AM. Three, I really have paid no attention to spring training whatsoever. They won it all last year, and they should be very good again this year. I’m not spending a lot of time fretting over who the fifth outfielder or starting pitcher is. That stuff will work itself out as the days go by.

For those of you like me that have been watching John Adams, I’ve got to say I was bored by the third episode. The French stuff was just weird, and Ben Franklin went from being a fun guy to a real jerk, although Adams comes across as an impatient oaf too. Man, what a different way of life, though. Just to get to France took forever, because they had to travel via boat, and that was treacherous enough. Then when you need to get info back and forth, that takes weeks right there. No wi-fi, no phones.

The other thing that opens your eyes is the way they deal with sickness. Any time they do anything medical-related on this show I cringe. In the past two weeks we’ve had a disgusting inoculation, the small pox in full breakout, a blood-letting, and an amputation with a hacksaw. My stomach can’t take much more of this.

And, on top of it all, now poor Adams is going to have to somehow heal from his mystery illness and then keep his wife from cheating on him with Thomas Jefferson. The road to the second presidency sure hasn’t been easy.

And we’re live, although you’ll read this on delay since Eagle One lacks wi-fi at the Eagle’s Nest. We’re surrounded by an empty pizza box, a huge freaking wide screen hi-def, and some adult beverages as we tune in to March Madness. Good times, very good times.

EO: Reminds me of college. College!!

Unfortunately your intrepid blogger has seen absolutely no hoops today until the end of the first halves of these games. I’ve been in the city all day and just got back as a half-court heave missed the mark by a smidge. We then tore into a double cheese, sausage pizza that lasted about three minutes.

So we’re watching hoops as UNC breaks off their Nikes in Mount St. Mary’s derrieres and the Eagle reminds me of our greatest March Madness experience. I somehow hooked us up with free golf and a place to stay through the job in Myrtle Beach. After 18 we did pretty much what we’re doing right now and saw UNC lose to Weber State and Harold Archambeault, who had his one shining moment that night and knocked off the Heels. That night, from what I remember, was a lot of fun.

Classic moment, UNC fast break, Marcus Ginyard all alone and goes up for a tomahawk jam, only to come up short and then fall on his butt. The dude’s six-feet five inches and he misses the easiest try of his life. However, less than 30 seconds later Alex Stephenson showed him how its done by throwing one down with two-hands, authoritatively.

Let’s hope that they’re sending us to another game soon. UNC’s up 28 with just over 13minutes to go. Speaking of big numbers, we just found out Hazel Mae’s real age, through a friend of a friend. I won’t tell you, but think Mo Vaughn.

We’re now switched to an upset in the making, Sienna against Vandy, and the Commies find themselves down 12 early in the second half. Eagle One’s feeling good about his upset special of Sienna, but let’s not forget that yesterday Georgia had a big lead on Xavier at about the same time.

And just like that it’s down to nine, and then a turnover, and another three, ooooh. Close.

Note no one cares about. Our buddy Flash’s brother went to Sienna. Now back to stuff you might care about.

I’ll take this commercial break to implore you to watch John Adams on HBO. It’s fantastic. Paul Giammatti is great and the historic stuff is really, really interesting. Do yourself a favor and start watching.

We’ve just discovered that the Vandy coach looks just like Champ Kind of the Channel-4 News team. “I miss your scent … how about when this whole thing’s over we get an apartment together.”

Coach Champ Kind just got a T. He must have told the ref he was going to take his mom out for a nice steak dinner and never call her back. “That woman’s a saint.”

Man Law: Unless you went to or are a major fan of the school playing, if you’re a sports fan you are obligated to root for any team seeded No. 11 or lower if they are close to winning, regardless of the teams you picked in your brackets.

The reason for that law is right now No. 11 St. Joe’s is within nine of Oklahoma and about to cut it to seven. And now it’s down to five.

Score check: UNC up 43, Vandy down 12, Oregon up 3.

Bill Raftery, “a little money.” Deep three, under four and St. Joes pulls to within four.

I want Bill Raftery and Gus Johnson to do play-by-play for my life for just one day. It’d sound like I was Kal-El.

GJ: “Maclone, pounding the keyboard, and HE HIT’S THE ENTER KEY.”

BR: “So sweet, so nice.”

Well St. Joe’s is going to need a miracle now. Under two minutes, down eight. Nice game, but no upset here. Oh well, we followed the Man Law anyways.

Eagle One’s wife, Eagle Two, works in Southie. EO on Southie, “It’s like going to Japan, a whole other universe. If they leave Southie at all it‘s like going on vacation.”

Time for CBS to switch us over to Oregon-Mississippi State soon. This game’s over, and that’s a one-point game. Let’s go Ducks.

Are there any athletes that don’t have any tattoos? It’s almost like they’re issued along with high tops and tube socks. “Here are your Nikes, and the Japanese symbol for ‘jump shot.’”

Eagle One’s dancing, and I only wish I had a video camera. It’s like a full-body vomit. He’s very excited about his pick of Siena.

Eagle One: Stat of the day, Drake-Western Kentucky, 70 3’s attempted, 30 made. Remmeber he championed the Hilltoppers and Big Red in our preview.

Commercial, we switched over to WWE Smackdown and let’s just say that the days of Superfly Jimmy Snuka and yellow and red Hulk Hogan are long, long, long gone. Some guy named Festus just looks like an escapee from an insane asylum.

Another loss for my bracket. No Ducks in round two. Oh well. My Final Fours are all still alive at least.

Since the early games are ending, and the late ones are just starting, we’re going to take a Poker Stars break. Eagle One needs me to help him revive his account.

Eagle One, who has brought a deck chair into the living room, makes it official: “9:33 and the sausage is killing me.”

What is it about Oregon and ugly unis? The football team has ugly unis, and the basketball team’s are in league with those. Who decided electric yellow and forest green were a good combo? Ray Charles?

***

Back from poker, and it was an unmitigated disaster. Let’s just say that Rich and Eagle One didn’t run very well. Ran into pocket queens in one game, and then a set of fours in the next. Oh well. Maybe this isn’t the best time to announce my intention to audition for The Best Damn Poker Show on Fox Sports, but I’m going to.

Here’s the difference between men and women, well, one of many. Guys watch TV and love to surf the remote. We’ve watched mostly the games, but also wrestling, a U2 concert, golf (just saw Tiger sink an unreal putt), 20/20 and a variety of other stuff. Oh, and bathroom humor, too. That’s another big difference.

We’re starting to wane. The game’s aren’t bad right now, but it’s getting to be about 11 and we’re old men. Gone are the days of partying up until 3 AM and falling down hills.

Not really digging the trend so far. One close game of the four mid-day games, and three blowouts. The Marquette-Kentucky game was good, going down to the wire. That Joe Crawford’s pretty good. He hit for 35 and kept the Cats in the game by himself. It was impressive to watch, but the Golden Eagles found a way to hold on and they advanced. Marquette’s defense has really quick hands. They seemed to get a lot of deflections in big spots and forced the action. Kentucky’s perimeter game was working, but they just had too many long scoring droughts.

All of the other games are just old-fashioned beatdowns. As far as the day goes, so far it’s been kind of weird because not only are all of the higher seeds winning, but for the most part they’re winning big. We need more close games, we need some announcer’s losing it. We need bench players jumping up and down. Seriously, I just yawned.

Had a nice lunch from Box Lunch on Main St. John Alden, Utz chips and a big freakin’ brownie. Best $10 I’ve spent in a while. MMMMM.

Actually have had to do some work, so I’ve only been paying a little attention to the games. The Baby Boilers are smoking Baylor right now. I made a last-minute switch on my final bracket and took Purdue in that game. I liked the Baby Boilers nickname and figured any team with a good nickname like that was good for a first round win in a 50-50 game. Hey, there’s not too much that’s scientific about this stuff.

Also watching some of the Marquette-Kentucky game. Good game so far. Marquette seems pretty tough, and Kentucky’s down a bit this year. Haven’t noticed yet if Ashley Judd is in attendance. Hope she didn’t make plans to be there on Saturday, because she’ll be watching the Warriors instead I think if she did.

Really was starting to think that Georgia was a team of destiny. It’s funny, I rooted for them all last weekend to win the SEC (which they did) after they had to play two games on the same day. But, since I had Xavier in the brackets, I was rooting hard for the X-Men. So funny how that stuff works.

Great first round game, though. You’ve got to like the fortitude we saw out of the Musketeers. Down 11 in the second half they looked beaten, but then a shot fell, and they created some turnovers and before you knew it was down to six, then four. Next thing you know it’s tied and then the freshman drains the three to give them their first lead of the second half and they’re on their way.

With about a minute left for Georgia Woodbury put up a three that looked like it would go, the thing hit every part of the rim, but wouldn’t fall. If that goes down, two point game. Instead it stays five and then the Musketeers start hitting free throws.

The other games went according to seed. So much for Temple providing me an upset in the brackets. Oh well. Kansas dominated. My picks so far, 2-1 after three.

Some intriguing games on the docket for mid-day. I’m thinking I may be spending time with Baylor-Purdue. Kent State and UNLV could be good too. And, we’ve also go Kentucky-Marquette, which could be really good, and Oral Roberts and Pitt.

Oh man, they’re already starting. Freakin’ March Madness, it’s unreal. Georgia’s up 9 on Xavier at the half, and I’ve got the Musketeers in the Elite 8. I know a lot of people have them going at least that deep too. Talk about a bracket buster, and we’re still in the first hour of the tourney.

Also, one of my “sure thing” upsets is going by the wayside. I had Temple knocking off Michigan State. To quote Glenn Ordway, “how’s that working out for ya.”

Well, at least Kansas is laying the smacketh down. There’ some sanity in the world.